Real men sometimes don’t eat meat, fish or dairy either—and I have something to say about that
Adeline loves eating, a lot and often, both at home and out. Usually that goes well, but sometimes it doesn’t. In the series Sunday Roast, she shares her observations. This week: real men who sometimes don’t eat meat.
If there’s one diner who is misunderstood in the world, it’s probably the vegan. I’m not claiming innocence, because I too run back to the supermarket when my vegan sister-in-law comes over for lunch. Not because I don’t know how to make anything decent, but because I want to prove to her that I really can cook delicious vegan food. Which is actually strange, because if anyone knows that vegan food can be tasty too… Food for thought, as they say.
Appropriately suspicious
On Saturday we ate vegan shawarma. Pita bread in the oven, lettuce to chop, dairy-free garlic sauce and a little vegan shawarma on the stove. Then came the great assembly, which for me accounts for twenty-five percent of the joy of snacking. Another twenty-five percent is not spilling on my new sofa while eating in front of the TV. Yet another twenty-five is the taste. And finally, at least twenty-five percent consists of the fact that what I’m eating isn’t meat. My other half was appropriately suspicious at first, but he too was audibly enjoying himself beside me on the sofa while we binged a little Netflix. So far so vegan.
The butt of the joke
After the weekend, he came home from work feeling rather aggrieved. I wanted to know what was wrong. He had enthusiastically told an unsuspecting passer-by about the vegan version of shawarma, because in his opinion anything delicious should be shared, but the plant-based version had been dismissed as downright ridiculous. Correction: eating meat-free shawarma as a man was mainly the butt of the joke. And I have something to say about that.
In prehistoric times
It’s a fact that twice as many women as men eat vegan in our country. But it doesn’t detract from your masculinity (or femininity—let’s not stereotype) if your food hasn’t breathed and hasn’t been slaughtered. In fact, in prehistoric times we ate meat much less often and had to live off vegetables and fruit for days. What am I saying? They still do that in Okinawa, and research shows that people there live considerably longer. Incidentally, the test results said nothing about masculinity decreasing over the years due to a lack of steak. And I believe our ancestors still functioned after a few days of spinach and apples.
Cheers to your potency!
There’s nothing masculine about choosing a chunk of meat at the butcher’s or putting a plastic tray of bargain meat in your shopping cart at the supermarket. Let alone does eating it make you more of a man (or woman or gender-neutral person).
And last but not least, we can always zoom in on the fact that a plant-based diet has a huge effect on potency. But I really mean e-nor-mous. The documentary Game Changers revealed that with a diet without animal ingredients, erections were bigger, better and more frequent. For one test subject, it was even 400 (!) percent bigger. Anyone for some vegan shawarma?
Also read:
