Snackspert: these three supermarket products are really, really GROSS
Eke Bosman, better known as Instagram phenomenon @snackspert, ate his first frikandel as a baby, hates vlammetjes, has devoured at least 1,500 burgers in his lifetime, suspects that his body contains more mayonnaise than blood, and shares his best and worst snack reviews on FavorFlav. This time: poverty reigns, because these three supermarket products are just really, really gross.
Empanada Roti, Albert Heijn
I know that a lot of people got incredibly angry about these new Albert Heijn products, and I get it, but to be honest, I’m always in favor of mixing different food cultures. Otherwise, we’d never have the kapsalon, you know. But sometimes I understand the frustration, because empanadas with roti inside? How does that work? One of them is filled with spiced pumpkin, yardlong beans, peas and carrot, well. Spiced pumpkin too—what is even spiced about it? And what is roti about it?! I don’t see any dough within dough. They’ve removed just as much soul from the empanada as Harry Potter did from Voldemort back then. Very bad. ⭐️
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📍: Albert Heijn
📱: @albertheijn
💰: 4 euros each
Pulled Pork Soup, Lidl
Staying in bed while a mosquito flies around your room, stepping on a LEGO brick, standing in the rain by the football pitch while your team is 0–7 down… these are all things I’d rather do than eat this pulled pork soup from Lidl one more time. Who came up with this? And how much hatred does that person have in their soul? You could already tell it was going to be gross, because the fact that it keeps until June 2025 says enough, right? Yeah no, it’s like eating a jar of gravy with pieces of pulled pork that are far too soft. Much, much too soft—so soft that they don’t even stay between your teeth, because after seven seconds they dissolve on their own. I’m sorry, Lidl, I love you guys, but never again. Never. ⭐️
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📍: Lidl
📱: @lidlnederland
💰: 2.49 euros, but hahaha, why would you ever buy this
Vegetarian vegetable bapao, Jumbo
Things you’d better not give your partner for Valentine’s Day: a vegetable bapao from Jumbo. Unless, of course, you want to indicate that your intimate life with them is lacking some fire, because this bapao is the equivalent of a failed date. No excitement in your mouth, little flavor, completely unattractive, absolutely nothing. You really shouldn’t call this vegetable bapao a bapao; white cabbage, carrot and onion inside? Where’s the flavor enhancer? It does contain some garlic powder, soy and salt, but it’s like planning a movie night with your loved one when you don’t have a television at home. I don’t know what they’re doing over at Jumbo, but this bapao is a complete failure. ⭐️
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📍: Jumbo
📱: @jumbo
💰: 1.19 euros
Read also:
- Snackspert is ecstatic about the croissants from Fort Negen in Amsterdam
- Snackspert tests the Double Chili Chicken: ‘what creative poverty at McDonald’s’
- An ode to the sausage roll (and where to get the tastiest ones!)
