Why I never want to eat an English breakfast again
Recently, I was in London, my favorite city. And there I made a big mistake. No, I wasn’t hanging off the chandeliers, completely hammered in an English pub, and I didn’t spend all my money on overpriced Queen Elizabeth merchandise either (I wanted to). What I did do: order an English breakfast. The reason? ‘I’m here now anyway.’ The worst reason ever – I don’t buy out Zara either ‘because I’m here now anyway,’ do I? – and I paid the price. These are 5 reasons why I will never, ever attempt a classic English breakfast again – and why you might not want to either.
Intestines running wild
I’m not going into detail. There is absolutely no need for that. But what I do want to say is that if you have irritable bowel syndrome – like me – eating an English breakfast is the very, very, very worst choice you can make.
A massive calorie bomb
An English breakfast is huge. If you go for the full-size version, you’ll easily hit 640 calories. Do you have high calorie needs? Then you can handle that. But because I’m small, that doesn’t apply to me. A bowl of oatmeal containing around 150 calories is enough for me. Or a banana.
Not exactly healthy
Of course, calories don’t say everything about how healthy a dish is. You can certainly consume plenty of calories while eating healthy food. Now, it may not exactly knock you off your chair, but an English breakfast can’t really be called healthy. It’s fatty because of the sausages, high in sugar because of the white bread and baked beans in tomato sauce, and it contains a lot of salt (1+1+1 = 3 for people with irritable bowel syndrome). Yes, you can make it healthier at home. But the chances of being served a healthy version of this meal when you’re in England are slim.
Fried mushrooms for breakfast…
Don’t get me wrong: fried mushrooms are delicious. In risotto, pasta or a tortilla, I want it all (check out this recipe for a tortilla with serrano ham and mushrooms!). But not at 7 a.m.
And definitely no sausage
I don’t think any explanation is needed.
English breakfast lover? This is where you need to go in London
Can’t relate to my arguments at all? That’s possible; tastes (and intestines) differ. Anyone who still wants to tuck into sausages, potatoes, bacon, beans and eggs during a weekend in London has to go to E. Pellicci. Yes, this Italian-sounding little place really does serve the best full English breakfast in London. Enjoy!
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