Emma’s food annoyances: fruit in my food
I eat often, a lot and with great pleasure, and then I regularly notice something. Often these are positive things, but it also frequently happens that something irritates me immensely. Whether that’s justified or not, sometimes I just need to vent. This time: fruit in my food.
Humanity is divided into two groups. The group that enjoys stirring dried apricots and raisins through their couscous and freshening up a salad with a crunchy piece of apple, and the group that is disgusted by it. I belong to the second group.
Fruit juices
At the office, salad is made for us every day. Absolutely delicious. On Thursdays, it’s always the same one: with chicken satay and mango. While all my colleagues look forward eagerly to this salad with an Asian twist every week, I chew on crackers every Thursday. I really have tried picking the mango out of the salad, but those mango pieces have long since released their moist fruit juices into the rest of the salad. Yuck.
On the verge of despair
That’s the biggest problem with this intense personal aversion: fruit lovers don’t understand that a tiny raisin can cause so much emotional damage to people like me. On menus, you often can’t even detect the fruit in question. You think you’re safe ordering a salad with crab, avocado and lime (which, incidentally, doesn’t count as fruit, but as sour). Bam! Mandarin segments all over your plate and you’re on the verge of despair.
Say no to pineapple
I don’t think I even need to start on Hawaiian pizza, but I’m going to anyway. I can’t think of another example where fruit ruins so much of an otherwise perfect product. I’ve also never understood fried rice served in a pineapple, and why does the yellow fruit belong on a barbecue skewer with lamb?
Salty and savory
I also much prefer eating Parma ham on its own rather than wrapped around a watery piece of honeydew melon. My food should be savory, and salty. I love a small sweet touch—sticky chicken wings with honey, for example—but there are limits, and those limits are fruit. I love fruit. In my yoghurt or oatmeal, as a healthy snack or baked into a pie, but can everyone please keep it away from all my savory food?
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