6 incomprehensible products from Albert Heijn
Albert Heijn, Appie, AH, Ap; whatever you want to call it. Our great friend with the blue letters. I like going there, but every now and then I also laugh myself silly at some of the products on the shelves. The Albert Heijn Comedy Club? That would sell well!
Recently, we were already amazed by the enormous variety of chicken fillet at Albert Heijn. But there are many more products on the shelves at the Ap that make you think: ‘WHY are you selling this?’ Do you remember the terrible vegan foie gras? But there’s even more to be amazed by, hence:
6 incomprehensible products from Albert Heijn
Sandwich slices of smoked salmon
Yes, clever. Because ordinary smoked salmon obviously can’t go on your sandwich. It doesn’t fit nicely. Technically, that’s impossible, because the salmon would overlap your slice of brown bread. So, sandwich slices of salmon; problem solved. How far can we get from the source?! Thinly sliced smoked salmon in a convenient format. Costs you €5.59…
Peeled garlic cloves
Really? Okay, I can understand that people may not like their fingers smelling of garlic when they peel a clove themselves. But come on, peeling isn’t what makes them smell, it’s more the chopping. Besides, there are simply ways to get rid of your garlic hands. A little container with 7 peeled garlic cloves costs more than two euros! While 2 whole bulbs cost just €1.19.
Fried bacon bits
This product was invented for the laziest people at Albert Heijn. Fried bacon bits? If there’s one thing that takes no effort, it’s frying bacon bits. You don’t even need oil or butter. Okay, if you live in a tiny place and have the sense of smell of a police dog, then maybe it’s allowed. But actually, no, not even then. Fry. Them. Yourself.
Grated cheese
In the category of choice overload, pay attention now: have you ever noticed how many different types of grated cheese there are on the shelves at the Ap? There are 37! THIRTY-SEVEN! Including Pizza cheese, Hotchpotch cheese, Pasta cheese, Pancake cheese and Tex-Mex cheese. No, this is not a joke and yes, it’s all simply grated cheese. Don’t let them fool you and don’t be so lazy; you can just grate your ‘regular cheese’ over your pancake.
Scoopable yogurt
Scoopable yogurt. Yogurt you can scoop, that is. Quark? Greek yogurt? Whole-milk yogurt? Skyr? No: scoopable yogurt.
Sliced smoked salmon loin
Smoked salmon loin. Salmon loin? “The juiciest part from the back of the salmon,” as it’s so nicely marketed. The back of the salmon is just salmon fillet, right? Yes, but Appie calls it salmon loin, slices it and sells it for €6.49 per 150 grams. Ladies and gentlemen, just buy a whole salmon from your fishmonger; it’s cheaper, and then you get everything from the beautiful fish. Yes, including the salmon loin.
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