My Vegetarian Nephews Secretly Eat Meat at My Place (and They Love It)
My vegetarian nephews secretly eat meat at my place. Sounds like the title of a new Netflix series about family relationships and meatballs, but it’s simply Marjolein’s life. Because yes, what do you do as an aunt: stick to your sister’s strict dietary rules, or let those children enjoy a frikandel?
No Children, but Plenty of Sleepovers
Marjolein (48) and her boyfriend Tjerk have been together for five years, but children? No, that never happened. Not a conscious choice, more a combination of not feeling the urge and not having met the right man—until Tjerk, that is. But when her younger half-sister Charlotte had children, Marjolein blossomed as an aunt. “I get the benefits, not the burdens,” she says about it herself. And so babysitting her nephews (now 8 and 10) is a real treat. Well, except for one detail…
A Vegetarian Upbringing with a Capital V
Charlotte is raising her children strictly vegetarian. “Until they were five, they were even largely vegan,” sighs Marjolein. “I explained to her that I find that pretty intense for children. They do need animal proteins, right? A bit of fish now and then can’t hurt, can it?” But Charlotte is steadfast. No fish, meat, or even the shadow of a meatball enters her house.
At Auntie’s, It’s Allowed: From Tofu to a Frikandel Speciaal
Luckily for the nephews, they live nice and close to Auntie Marjolein. And Auntie Marjolein loves snacking. It started innocently: a bitterbal here, a fish finger there, and the occasional frikandel speciaal. But by now, the boys know: staying at Auntie’s means a party. “Their favorite? Chicken satay. With that delicious sauce Tjerk makes.” And so they secretly tuck in. Wide-eyed and with mouths full. Marjolein: “They absolutely brighten up. Really, as if I’m taking them to Efteling for a day, but culinary-style.”
“A Little Secret at Our Place”
Marjolein knows this isn’t entirely acceptable. “When the youngest recently said that he loved bitterballen so much, Charlotte wondered where he had gotten them. So I admitted that he had eaten them at our place. I added that it was an accident.” Charlotte was—how surprising—not amused. “She really thinks I’m crossing her boundaries. But I see it differently: I’m simply letting them be children for a moment. Letting them enjoy themselves. It’s not that bad, is it?”
Frikandel or Parenting Boundary: Which Matters More?
And so Marjolein is now left with a troubled conscience and a drawer full of frikandellen. Because yes, what’s worse: making a child happy with a bitterbal, or making your sister angry by breaking her rules? “Maybe I’m wrong,” she says honestly. “But when I see how happy they are with a portion of kibbeling, I think it’s worth it. Honestly? I think they’ll decide for themselves later what they do and don’t want to eat.”
Vegetarian at Home, Fish Fingers at Marjolein’s: Who’s in the Wrong Here?
The big dilemma: should you always respect someone else’s rules in your own home? And more importantly, should a child suffer because of their parents’ food choices when they are clearly craving a croquette? “I love my sister dearly, I really do. But sometimes I think: let those children live a little. One fish finger isn’t going to make them worse people.”
Voting may be anonymous. Just like eating bitterballen.
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Marjolein’s name has been changed for privacy reasons. Her real name is known to the editorial team. Would you also like to share a personal story (anonymously!)? You can email us at info@favorflav.com
