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My Vegetarian Nephews Secretly Eat Meat at My Place (and They Love It)

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My vegetarian nephews secretly eat meat at my place. Sounds like the title of a new Netflix series about family relationships and meatballs, but it’s simply Marjolein’s life. Because yes, what do you do as an aunt: stick to your sister’s strict dietary rules, or let those children enjoy a frikandel?

Foto van culinair journalist Sharon van Lokhorst

No Children, but Plenty of Sleepovers

Marjolein (48) and her boyfriend Tjerk have been together for five years, but children? No, that never happened. Not a conscious choice, more a combination of not feeling the urge and not having met the right man—until Tjerk, that is. But when her younger half-sister Charlotte had children, Marjolein blossomed as an aunt. “I get the benefits, not the burdens,” she says about it herself. And so babysitting her nephews (now 8 and 10) is a real treat. Well, except for one detail…

A Vegetarian Upbringing with a Capital V

Charlotte is raising her children strictly vegetarian. “Until they were five, they were even largely vegan,” sighs Marjolein. “I explained to her that I find that pretty intense for children. They do need animal proteins, right? A bit of fish now and then can’t hurt, can it?” But Charlotte is steadfast. No fish, meat, or even the shadow of a meatball enters her house.

At Auntie’s, It’s Allowed: From Tofu to a Frikandel Speciaal

Luckily for the nephews, they live nice and close to Auntie Marjolein. And Auntie Marjolein loves snacking. It started innocently: a bitterbal here, a fish finger there, and the occasional frikandel speciaal. But by now, the boys know: staying at Auntie’s means a party. “Their favorite? Chicken satay. With that delicious sauce Tjerk makes.” And so they secretly tuck in. Wide-eyed and with mouths full. Marjolein: “They absolutely brighten up. Really, as if I’m taking them to Efteling for a day, but culinary-style.”

“A Little Secret at Our Place”

Marjolein knows this isn’t entirely acceptable. “When the youngest recently said that he loved bitterballen so much, Charlotte wondered where he had gotten them. So I admitted that he had eaten them at our place. I added that it was an accident.” Charlotte was—how surprising—not amused. “She really thinks I’m crossing her boundaries. But I see it differently: I’m simply letting them be children for a moment. Letting them enjoy themselves. It’s not that bad, is it?”

Frikandel or Parenting Boundary: Which Matters More?

And so Marjolein is now left with a troubled conscience and a drawer full of frikandellen. Because yes, what’s worse: making a child happy with a bitterbal, or making your sister angry by breaking her rules? “Maybe I’m wrong,” she says honestly. “But when I see how happy they are with a portion of kibbeling, I think it’s worth it. Honestly? I think they’ll decide for themselves later what they do and don’t want to eat.”

Vegetarian at Home, Fish Fingers at Marjolein’s: Who’s in the Wrong Here?

The big dilemma: should you always respect someone else’s rules in your own home? And more importantly, should a child suffer because of their parents’ food choices when they are clearly craving a croquette? “I love my sister dearly, I really do. But sometimes I think: let those children live a little. One fish finger isn’t going to make them worse people.”

Wat vind jij? Mag tante Marjolein haar neefjes vlees geven, of moet ze zich aan het vegetarische dieet houden?
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Voting may be anonymous. Just like eating bitterballen.

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Marjolein’s name has been changed for privacy reasons. Her real name is known to the editorial team. Would you also like to share a personal story (anonymously!)? You can email us at info@favorflav.com

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