Screw Off with Your Easter Eggs
Adeline loves food, a lot of it and often, both at home and out. Usually that goes well, but sometimes it doesn’t. In the series Sunday Roast, she shares her observations. This week, she made a shocking discovery in her local supermarket.
This week, it was my turn to go to the supermarket. At home, we practically fight over whose turn it is. I went in the morning. There were three reasons for this. 1) I wanted to quickly go before work. 2) It’s less busy in the supermarket. 3) My boyfriend refused to drink coffee without creamer, and no caffeine can have disastrous consequences for the rest of the day. So off to the supermarket I went.
Dressed-Up Corner
In the supermarket, I happily wandered around for a bit. Until, unsuspecting, I reached the end of the fourth aisle, turned left and came face to face with the eggs.
It wouldn’t have mattered if I meant the regular eggs here, but of course I don’t. It was a slightly too cheerful and garishly dressed-up corner with Easter bunnies and Easter eggs. Easter-eggs. Why? It’s early January, guys. Easter isn’t until April 9. Just calm down. It’s far too early for Easter eggs. Just entertain yourself with a chocolate bar for two months.
Barely Digested
Be honest, have you thought about Easter for even one second yet? Or about what you’d like to eat around the resurrection of Christ? No, of course not. That chocolate letter and Christmas stollen have only just been digested and flushed away. Nobody is giving a hoot about an Easter egg. After thinking all of this at once, I took a photo as evidence and sternly admonished myself: ‘Adeline, it’s a perfectly reasonable shelf with four tiers. Don’t be ridiculous.’
I pushed my cart (for nothing but that creamer) around the corner, and then my brain short-circuited. The perfectly reasonable shelf blocked my view of the rest of the Easter eggs. The rest, yes. I came face to face with an enormous shelf, filled from top to bottom and topped off with eggs. Pink eggs, golden eggs, caramel-sea-salt eggs (I need to remember those), white eggs, green eggs, striped eggs, fifty-fifty eggs, pizza Easter eggs (brr!)… thousands and thousands of eggs in those little bags with an irritating clip closure that digs under your nails when you open it.
Easter Eggs in January?!
Supermarkets, I have one thing to say to you: screw off with your Easter eggs.
The fact that you wanted to sell me gingerbread nuggets in August was bad enough, but Easter eggs in January? In broad daylight? I simply cannot deal with that. Ideally, I’d like supermarkets to put those eggs where the sun doesn’t shine. And then bring them out sometime at the end of March to bury them in the garden for the children.
Also read:
- Corona news: chocolate Easter bunnies in quarantine
- We need to talk about people who chew ice creams
- Dishes that (Michelin-starred) chefs never put on the menu
