Can we please stop with all those Christmas wreaths?
A Christmas wreath made with almond paste: lots of fun. One made with Christmas branches and leaves on the front door: cozy. But could we maybe stop putting everything in a circle and calling it a Christmas wreath? I’m getting a little tired of it.
When you think of a Christmas wreath, I think of the pastry shop and almond paste. Especially delicious when you put that wreath in the oven for a bit, then enjoy a warm piece with hot chocolate—very cozy. Nostalgic, too. And then I saw it online: the charcuterie wreath. Well, how creative. Arranging all those slices of ham and sausage into a little wreath, with a decorative tomato or olive in between—why not, really.
Germophobia
But the germophobe in me began to stir: so all of that has been enthusiastically handled by someone, folding it into pretty little roses and arranging it neatly in a circle. Um, how hygienic is all this? To be honest: the same reservations I had about last year’s trend, the charcuterie chalet.
Toothpicks
Next trend: the aperitif Christmas wreath. Between leaves of basil and rosemary sit toothpicks skewered with mozzarella, cherry tomatoes, cubes of salami and cubes of cheese. And all of it arranged in a cheerful round wreath, an idea from a women’s magazine in Belgium. Sure enough, you can see Pinterest filling up with wreaths. But really: who eats all that? And the four of you? Respect! And when you see this, you already know: the cheese wreath can’t be far behind. No, there it is already: with walnuts, pieces of blue cheese, dried apricots, cubes of young cheese and goat cheese, arranged in a circle with green napkins and a gold-colored bow.
Jumping on the sofa
Your fillings will fall out when you see the macaron wreath. You can also make that one with store-bought macarons, the food blogger who came up with this assures us all. Then you make some delicious meringues with whipped egg whites, and decorate the whole thing with sweets and those silver glitter balls. Yes, and then we’re going to eat it and jump on the sofas and bounce off the walls from the sugar rush, cry really hard for a bit, and then sleep on the sofa. What a sugar spike you’ll get!
It doesn’t stop
It doesn’t stop there, either. Cream puff Christmas wreath. Sausage-roll Christmas wreath. Sashimi Christmas wreath. Candy Christmas wreath. Tortilla Christmas wreath. Seriously, where does it end? My plea: don’t fiddle with every snack in your hands for ages first, don’t arrange everything in a circle, don’t turn everything into a ‘Christmas wreath’. Although? A frikandel Christmas wreath is still missing from the collection. And that (pay attention, Snackspert?) could actually be a very fun anti-Christmas Christmas wreath.
