Thursday dilemma: an alcoholic is joining dinner, no wine on the table?
If a vegetarian comes over for dinner, you cook something with vegetables and cheese. If your guests are watching their weight, you leave the deep fryer switched off. And if an alcoholic is your guest, do you also refrain from drinking wine yourself? And do you go ahead and make your fantastic coq au vin? Tricky, tricky…
The Netherlands has more than a million heavy drinkers; around 80,000 people are fully addicted to alcohol. They notice that quitting drinking isn’t easy: not only is it physically quite a challenge, but socially alcohol is so widely accepted that it’s not done to drink sparkling water instead of white wine.
Writer Jacqueline van Lieshout experienced this when she decided several years ago to stop with all those convivial glasses of wine and crazy drinks parties. ‘People often look at you strangely and think it’s “unpleasant”, or ask “Why? Did you have a problem?” or say “Come on, just have one with us”. As if stopping wasn’t difficult enough for me already,’ she tells RTL. Jacqueline wrote the book Ontwijnen about her experiences.
Everyone going dry
A little support would be nice, because quitting (heavy) drinking isn’t easy. But still, does that mean everyone has to go dry at a dinner party? Or does it? Researcher Martine Groefsema of Radboud University Nijmegen discovered that there is a relationship between seeing someone drink alcohol and developing an urge to have a drink yourself. When people saw someone order a beer they felt like having one themselves too. Imitation behavior, says Groefsema. ‘Apparently, people want to imitate someone else’s behavior so badly that they often copy drinking behavior without any coercion. It happens unconsciously.’
Virgin cocktails
If you take that into account, you’re making things difficult for someone who doesn’t want to drink if you pour a large glass of Burgundy right in front of them. It isn’t particularly considerate either, by the way. And cooking with alcohol? Quite apart from the fact that not all the alcohol evaporates from your sauce, food or drinks with an alcoholic flavor are also discouraged for people who want to stop drinking.
The taste and smell of alcohol can reignite their craving for a drink. Save your boeuf bourguignon or coq au vin for tomorrow and choose another recipe for this guest. Side note: for the same reason, it’s also not a great idea to stock up on 0.0 beers or alcohol-free wine or shake up virgin cocktails, however well-intentioned you may be.
Read also:
- 25 things we all say when we’re drunk
- Pine mouth syndrome exists, and you don’t want to suffer from it
- 16 things that happen when you let someone decorate your home while you’re drunk
Source: RTL, Quest
