Snackspert is raving: this is the best Turkish pizza I’ve ever had
Eke Bosman, better known as Instagram phenomenon @snackspert, ate his first frikandel as a baby, hates vlammetjes, has already devoured at least 1,000 burgers in his lifetime, suspects there is more mayonnaise in his body than blood, and shares his best and worst snack reviews on FavorFlav every other week. This week was delicious, with even a standout five-star review.
Hot dog sauce, HEMA
This is an ode to all the book summaries I used during my teenage years for oral quizzes about Dutch culture. Speaking of Dutch culture: the HEMA hot dog definitely belongs in it. With its iconic mustard sauce. And just like author Willem Frederik Hermans, I could now write an entire 984-page book about what that hot dog sauce does to me, but I can also just write a summary. Iconic, heavenly, missing a little of the creaminess of mayo, but still destined to enter the Dutch canon. C’est ça. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2
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?: HEMA
?: @hemanederland
?: 2 euros
Vegan grill sausage, Albert Heijn
Vegan grill sausage! Things are getting stranger by the day. Whenever I look at new snacks at Albert Heijn, 95% of the new products these days are vegan. It just goes to show how quickly the snack landscape can change. But anyway, the vegan grill sausage makes a very good attempt. What they’ve pulled off at Appie is perfectly replicating the texture of grill sausage; in terms of mouthfeel, it really is indistinguishable from a real grill sausage. As if a dildo in your mo— oh fine, you probably get what I mean. In terms of flavor, there is still something to criticize, such as that rather bitter aftertaste—but it should also be said that the first bites are pleasant. Work on that little issue a bit more, perhaps even add some vegan cheese, and you’ll have a vegan knockout that might even have made Paul de Leeuw’s Vegan Streaker get naked all over again. I think. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
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?: Albert Heijn
?: @albertheijn
?: 1.99 euros
Turkish pizza, Effendy
Do you want a five-star review? Then you’ll get a five-star review! And no, I don’t mean that this text deserves five stars, because as I’m typing this I don’t even know exactly what kind of story this will eventually become—but hey, that’s challenging for me too, right? But no, we’re talking about Effendy, a Turkish bakery on the Rozengracht in Amsterdam and the favorite spot of @liekeschrijft, who personally spammed me several times (seriously criminal, police, go check this out) telling me I had to try it. But she was right: this is the best Turkish pizza (I had the classic one with minced meat and cheese) I’ve ever had. No chemical junk, just pure love. The crust was taken out of the oven at exactly the right moment, giving it that wonderfully crispy crust you love so much. The melted cheese is everywhere, and it’s juicier than the average horny video on hamster websites. Ah well, yes, you know what I mean: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
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?: Effendy, Rozengracht in Amsterdam
?: @effendybakerycafe
?: 4.25 euros
Read also:
- Snackspert: “the Albert Heijn kebab roll is even emptier than my soul”
- Snackspert is raving about the Bicky Burger: get a Bicky at home as soon as possible
- Snackspert is wildly enthusiastic about the new Loempidel
