What’s in Your Shoe? This Is Your Sinterklaas Horoscope
In August, gingerbread cookies appear in the supermarket, and in January all the chocolate letters go half price—aren’t those wonderful moments in the year? Oh yes, and a bowl of gingerbread cookies on the table all through November to snack on, and filled speculaas with your coffee, and… Don’t know which Sinterklaas candy to choose? Then check your candy horoscope—you’ll immediately know why Sinterklaas always puts exactly the right sweets in your shoe.
Aries
March 21 – April 20
Testosterone is practically blowing out of Aries’ ears—even female Aries. Big chunks of speculaas make them truly happy. Filled with almond paste or plain, preferably homemade—that’s not difficult at all.
Taurus
April 21 – May 21
Taurus hauls big bags of Sinterklaas treats to work. The cookie tin is filled to the brim with kruidnoten, and absolutely everyone is allowed to snack along. Because tomorrow there’ll simply be a whole new bag!
Gemini
May 22 – June 21
That cheerful Gemini is a huge fan of Sinterklaas—and every other December party, for that matter. If Gemini has drawn your name, you can be sure you’ll be unwrapping your entire name, including all your baptismal names, in chocolate letters. With a matching poem, too. Thank you, Sinterklaas!
Cancer
June 22 – July 21
What a nostalgic type Cancer is. They sing Sinterklaas songs all month, watch Dieuwertje Blok every evening, and have no idea how often they need to visit the pastry shop for a new supply of marzipan potatoes. Bag empty already?
Leo
July 22 – August 22
Leo finds the whole Sinterklaas celebration a little childish, really, but once they discover that bishop’s wine is actually a thing, that some chocolate letters are filled with Bailey’s, and that gingerbread liqueur also exists, they’re willing to talk. Spanish Rioja does go rather well with Sinterklaas too, Leo, doesn’t it?
Virgo
August 23 – September 23
Virgo is mysterious and misunderstood, even when it comes to their preference for Sinterklaas candy. Wondering who always eats those super-chemical, sickly sweet mice and frogs? Take a look in Virgo’s desk drawer; there’s a mountain of shiny wrappers in there. Busted!
Libra
September 24 – October 23
Gingerbread cookies, but only the real, original, old-fashioned kind. They’re sort of square lumps with lots of anise—also ideal for weighing down your curtains, throwing a hole into someone’s head, or plugging your ears so you don’t have to hear those awful songs. Libra says they absolutely love them, but surely that’s impossible?
Scorpio
October 24 – November 22
That beautiful chocolate Sinterklaas standing in the pastry shop window will move to Scorpio’s kitchen today or tomorrow. Every day, they nibble a little piece off it, endlessly patiently, until the last remains disappear into hot chocolate on Sinterklaas Eve.
Sagittarius
November 23 – December 21
It really isn’t allowed anymore, but Sagittarius has somehow managed to illegally get hold of a batch: chocolate cigarettes. In those crazy little packs with made-up cigarette brands on them. And then pretending you’re really smoking. The fact that we ever thought this was fun children’s candy is unbelievable!
Capricorn
December 22 – January 20
If a big chewy gingerbread figure seems like an impossible task, invite Capricorn over. Those ochre-brown chunks of cookie disappear straight down Capricorn’s throat. Seriously, where do they put it all?
Aquarius
January 21 – February 18
Chocolate gingerbread cookies in the most bizarre flavors seem to have been made for Aquarius. White chocolate with sprinkles, apple pie, sea-salt caramel (of course), or cappuccino: Aquarius knows exactly what to do with them. And in spring, they throw themselves at Easter eggs in those crazy flavors with the same enthusiasm.
Pisces
February 19 – March 20
All those grumpy messages online about Sinterklaas hysteria and gingerbread cookies appearing in stores too early were probably written by Pisces. Somehow, their grumpiest side emerges during December. But when nobody’s looking, an entire net bag of chocolate coins has disappeared once again. Piet sees everything, Pisces, just so you know!
